The Road To Babyville

A Step Away From the Daily Grind For a Moment

2012-02-09T06:55:00.000-08:00

In light of recent events, I feel compelled to step away from triplet mommyhood for a moment. Here is a little overview:

1 - some asshole (yes, I swore, it's my blog and I'll swear if I want to) left my 14 year old nephew and his friend at school after cross country practice. This was an adult and he committed to doing car pool, yet his time was far too precious to wait for the 2 minors whose parents were trusting to him to be responsible for their well being. I must also point out that my nephew and his friend were NOT LATE! This douche just thought it was ok. So my sister gets a frantic phone call from him that he has no ride. Even better, the other boy's mother, who is a flight attendant, gets a call hours later (because she was working) from her son, also worried about being stranded. She and her husband were both in other states at the time! Needless to say, the boys are in another car pool and now this ass clown (thanks, Brienne) has to find a way for his kid to get to school every day now!

2 - my niece is "frenemies" with mean girls. These girls have been ganging up on my niece. I hope she ceases to be friends with them and finds more worthy, true friends, but they will probably make up, for now. Ugh, preteen girls suck!

3 - a friend of a friend came home with her 2 children to a man with a ski mask and a knife in their yard. She had already got her daughter inside and was going back out to get her son when she came across him. She thought he was going to kill her/them. He, instead, threw a cup full of acid into her face. She is being treated at U of M and is hoping to keep her eyesight.

SO, all of these things have caused me to ask, "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE!?!?" Remember back to the days, even weeks and months, after 9/11. When people showed compassion toward one another. When people banded together against the common enemy. What happened to make people abandon that way of thinking and treating people?

It just makes me even more determined to show kindness, respect and general caring to others and to make sure my kids are raised with those same values.

Ok, now help me down from my soapbox....

Things to remember

2011-12-30T22:25:00.000-08:00

So, just a couple cute little things I don't want to forget. It's late so this will be brief. This morning, after a somewhat rough evening of not being sure if Lainey had the stomach flu or just randomly threw up, she wakes up and after asking, "where's my daddy." (he was in the other room in case she did have the flu...I had already been puked on...kinda like the movie "Outbreak"... I had already been exposed). Anyway, she looked at my night gown and said, "are those little snow flags?". She calls snow FLAKES snow FLAGS! Hahaha!

This year when asked to wish people "Merry Christmas" Emery cheerfully, yet shyly, says, "Merry Pick-a-mas!". One of the cutest things ever! And her coy little smile just melts me!

George cracks me up with his wanna-be naked baby-yoga moves. Down-dog-turned-headstand-on-the-back-of-the-couch is among one of his favorite moves. All while giggling his contagious little laugh! He's a little crack up (no pun intended) that one!

I'm BAAACCCKKK!!!

2011-12-11T09:21:00.000-08:00

Well, it is my hope that I will sort of "restart" my blog. The trio are about to turn 3 next month and I feel that I will have a lot to blog about! Starting with potty training, which I am planning on doing after Christmas. Wish me luck!

I will try to jump on here when the naps are occuring to catch up on all the latest shenanigans!

Please Excuse My Poor Etiquette

2009-07-21T08:16:00.000-07:00

I am ashamed to say, and publicly admit, that I have not sent out a single "Thank You" note since the triplets came home...4 months ago! I am embarassed by this and my only excuse is these 3 gorgeous creatures that keep me busy 24/7 (well, except when I'm asleep)! A typical day in the life is:

8:00ish - wake up (yes, I know I am extremely lucky with this time! Thank you, cereal!)
diaper change X 3
bottle X 3 (thankfully Ryan is around to help with this one!)

9:00 - a little Baby Einstein so I can eat a quick bite, wash bottles, etc.

10:00 - bath time X 3 and usually a little rocking

12:00 - diaper, bottle, nap in swing, repeat 2 more times

2:00 - shower for me! and any other "chores" I can get done while they are napping

upon them waking, we try to do some kind of activities (walk, pool or just toys here)

4:00 - bottles again!

8:00 - diapers, pj's, cereal, bottles, bed! (oh yeah, X 3!)

Then after they are all in dreamland it's more washing bottles, etc. Thankfully, Ryan makes the formula and "porridge" as he calls their cereal. Oh yeah, I try to fit in some time to eat as well! Not complaining in the least...I love my "job"! Just wish I had someone to clean up and cook for me! haha!

I also have to give a "shout out" to my mom and sister...without them, I'd be a bumbling, smelly mess! They have helped me so much and came to my rescue on many occasions!

So, back to what this post was meant to be about, I apologize sincerely for my lack of Thank You notes to those that have sent the most generous gifts! I DO plan on getting them out at some point...PROMISE!

Wow...almost 5 months already?!?!

2009-06-13T18:36:00.000-07:00

Lainey, trying cereal for the first time by spoon. After she got used to the whole idea, she liked it. She was getting mad that I wasn't getting it in her mouth fast enough! Our mild mannered little girl was turning red, stiffening up and "yelping" at me! It was very cute and funny. Lainey has also found her voice, so to speak. She used to sit quietly and wait for someone to pick her up. She is still such a good baby but she doesn't like to sit and wait anymore...she will let you know she is there! Oh, but when she cries, it is the saddest thing...it makes me want to cry!
George kickin back in his swing! He is off oxygen during the day, but is still on it at night. I do have a feeling that will change this week though...he is supposed to be re-tested on Tuesday (fingers crossed)! George is definitely a mama's boy, much to daddy's dismay! He is still refluxing, but it seems to be getting a little better...I hope it's not just that we are getting used to it! He was weighed last week...11lbs 7 1/2oz! The girls haven't been weighed lately but if I had to guess, Emery is right behind George, probably around 11lbs and Lainey is our little peanut, probably around 10 1/2lbs. My little man is a major cuddler too!

Emery...this is one of my favorite pics of her! Though she is now completely off oxygen...guess I'll have to get another picture like this without that tube! This morning I was feeding Lainey in the nursery, George and Emery were both fussy. They are yet to have the coordination to get their binkys back into their own mouths. I heard a sucking noise coming from Emery's crib...she found her thumb and was going to town! It was really cute! She has tried to find it a few more times today...sometimes successful, sometimes not...and when she isn't, she gets mad!! Emery is smiling up a storm these days! George and Lainey are really starting to smile too, though Emery is the little charmer right now!

Here are all three together at around 4 months: (George, Emery, Lainey):

My days are busy, but couldn't imagine life any other way! The babies are eating cereal now at night and are sleeping really well! They usually will go down around 11pm and sleep til about 6am. Yesterday I had the babies out by the pool while my nephew, niece and their friends swam and then we went to Music In The Air last night...so lots of fresh air. They were SO ready to get home at the end. We fed them their cereal (Emery was too worn out to even finish!) and put them to be around 11...they slept until 9am!!! George was a little fussy around 8 and Ryan brought him to me in bed and we had a good cuddle! He was a cozy boy!

So, people say the strangest, funniest, rudest, oddest things when they see you with 3 babies. Last night was no exception. A man came up to us and said to Ryan, "Triplets!?" Ryan replied, "yup!" Then the man asked, "do twins run in your family?" Really? Twins? Ryan's response was great, "well, they usually crawl first." hahaha! I love his quick wit! The man looked a little confused! :P

We're Here...Just Busy...

2009-05-12T18:21:00.000-07:00

And my computer died...but now I have a new one!

Here is a pic of all three, at 3 months old:

Lainey - she is an angel! She is the kind of baby that makes you want to have a dozen more! She is long and skinny with lots of blonde curly hair (at least when it's wet it's curly). She was born the heaviest and she is now the little peanut, though she is the longest, she weighs the least (they will be weighed on Thursday before their Synagis shot but I think she is close to, if not 9lbs)

George - my poor little dude! He was having a lot of gas pain issues, Mylicon wouldn't touch it so he is now on Alimentum (was on Neosure) and Zantac. He is still quite fussy, so the doc said he must just be colicky.

Emery - she is funny! She is starting to smile and know why she is smiling...I love it! She is a feisty girl...she'll let you know if she's not happy with the way things are going!

I'll try to be better at keeping the blog updated!

Quick Update

2009-03-27T19:04:00.000-07:00

Here are a few quick pics. It's been a crazy and they are all home! All are doing well and are almost all at or above 6 lbs. more to come when we get our computer fixed...

A Big Day

2009-03-13T18:17:00.000-07:00

Today was a big day for us...we brought Emery home today! The last few days have been a whirlwind...meeting with our case worker, the neonatologist, hearing tests, physical therapists, etc. A quick update on how everyone is doing:

Emery - well, she is home! She is still our tiniest, weighing in at 4lbs 7oz. It was a little scary discussing her discharge but we finally felt comfortable (well as comfortable as we were gonna be) with bringing her home on oxygen and an apnea monitor. The monitor is only for when we are not directly with her (if she is sleeping in the pack and play in the other room or if it is night time and we are sleeping too). She had a few visitors today, Grandma and Grandpa Miller, Grandma (Umma) Kolb, Aunt Lissy and Tommy. Ryan's mom brought over a yummy dinner for us (thank you!). My dad put together a swing and helped with the whole oxygen delivery/set up. Tomorrow will be a big day too...cousins Spencer and Isabella will be meeting her for the very first time!

George - he is a little "lighter" after yesterday...aka, he had his circumcision. Poor little dude! He is 4lbs 11oz. Rumor has it, he may be coming home on Sunday. George will also be on oxygen and an apnea monitor, same as his sister. He is so darn handsome! I know there will be a lot of sad NICU nurses when this little heartbreaker goes home!

Lainey - previously in "the lead", our little blondie decided to slow down on her feeds and throw in a few apnea events for good measure. I think she wanted to let her brother and sister catch up to her so she wouldn't be leaving them! Then she let them pass her up! She is doing much better though. She is on room air (no oxygen) so her work is a little harder during feeding time. She is in the lead weight-wise though...5lbs 5oz! She has the most edible chubby cheeks! She may be able to come home on Monday...if she doesn't have any events that require stimulation to bring her heart rate back up. That would be a week event-free (well, events that require stims that is).

I am a little tired, so sorry, but no pics right now. I will try to download them tomorrow.

It is going to get a little harder for a few days, going between a baby at home and 2 in the hospital. My mom and dad went to the hospital tonight to snuggle with them. They also went last night so Ryan and I could have one last date night!

It is going to be so bittersweet when we bring the last baby home. We have had some truly wonderful nurses! It has been 7 weeks in the NICU and we have become so close to these nurses, doctors and respiratory therapists. I am going to do the March of Dimes walk with the hospital NICU team in April and the NICU reunion is in May. It seems strange to think about how much I am looking forward to these events and we still have 2 babies in there! haha!

Well, off to enjoy some "down time" before the next feeding!

At Long Last, Another Update

2009-02-25T15:50:00.000-08:00

HAPPY ONE MONTH BIRTHDAY, BABIES!!!!

Lainey, Emery, George

Sorry for the long delay in updating the blog...I need to find a couple extra hours in the day! The stronger and bigger the babies are getting, the more I am at the NICU and being "hands on" with their care, feedings, etc. Here is the latest rundown on each baby.

Elaina
Lainey is getting sooo big!!! As of today, drum roll please, our pink little cutie pie is 4 pounds 7 ounces!!! I could hardly believe it when I saw "2000 grams" on her chart today! She has continued to breast feed, though she usually only takes in a small amount before getting tired and then we have to put her feeding in thru the feeding tube. Today I gave her a bottle for the first time and she took in 13cc's like a champ! She is getting the cutest, most edible chubby cheeks too! She is still having some apnea events, so she is still on oxygen. Hopefully these will subside on all the babies as they approach 36 weeks gestation (they are currently 34 weeks, 2 days).

Emery
Our little peanut! She is still the littlest, but oh so strong! She is weighing in at 3 pounds 11 ounces!!! She is also continuing to "practice" breast feeding and, like her sister, gets sleepy easily. She is always good for a cute smile, followed by the cutest, sadest little pout, and then a smile again. She keeps us laughing! Yesterday, Ryan gave her her first bottle. She only took in 2 1/2 cc's but the nurse gave her a bottle this morning and she took in 12 cc's! This is all one step closer to them coming home! She is also having the occasional apnea events.

George
George...sweet George. He has all the NICU nurses loving him! He is quite the charmer. I think it comes from his tough beginning, everyone was pulling for him and he has made leaps and bounds in his recovery. Our little guy who we could barely touch when he was first born and after his surgery has become quite the little cuddler. He melts my heart! George is weighing in at 4 pounds!!! I think he will catch up to his big sister soon...he was on some medication to clear up his "hazey" lungs so he has been peeing out a lot of fluid lately. We are waiting to give George bottles until he is off the CPAP entirely and we can move his feeding tube to his nose. He was off CPAP for a day or so, but he was getting tired so he is on the CPAP for 3 hours, then on the cannula for 6, alternating. Boy, does he LOVE his cannula! He is breastfeeding as well...he is definitley a "boob man" as he puts his sisters to shame in this department! haha! He does so well with it and also goes after his pacifier with a vengeance. He also HATES to have a messy diaper and he will always let you know when it's time for a clean diaper!

These babies are my whole world...and I speak for Ryan as well. I often think when the nurses ask, "do you need anything?" when Ryan and I are holding a baby or babies, "no...everything I need in this world is right here behind these curtains." True bliss!!!

Another Update...as promised!

2009-02-14T20:11:00.000-08:00

Mommy and her girls, Emery on the left, Lainey on the right:
Mommy w/George:

He's really been enjoying Kangaroo Care now...before his surgery he pretty much just wanted to be left alone...now his cuddly side is emerging!

Lainey is in a "big girl" crib now!!!

She loves her binky! (Actually, they are all binky babies...they LOVE them!)

Emery was a couple days behind her sister, but she is also in a big girl crib now!

Sleeping so soundly!

Umma Cindi bought the babies their first valentine shirts...they were all sleeping so soundly I didn't want to wake them so we just laid them on them for the pictures!

Lainey (typically Lainey will be in pink):

Lainey is doing great. Her most recent cranial ultrasound showed that the ventricles were shrinking!!! Such a huge relief! At her most recent "weigh in" (yesterday) she was 3lbs 6oz and she's getting some meat on her bones!

George:

George is doing great too. He is up to 24cc's for his feeds, and fortified with extra calories...tomorrow he will go up to 27cc's which is full feeds for him right now, his "goal" is 30cc's, or about 1oz, 8 times a day. His PICC line should be coming out soon and he may be going to a canula/CPAP alternating soon as well! He is weighing in at 3lbs 9oz...taking the lead as the biggest!

Emery (typically Emery will be in purple):

Emery helps to keep us sane! Thank God, she has not had any major issues (knock on wood)! She is at full feeds for her size, which is 3lbs! Finally, all the babies are at least 3lbs!!!

Ryan and I spent the evening at the hospital, as we do every night, but today was Valentine's Day and we couldn't have asked for a better way to spend our night...on a "date" with our 3 little ones! We had a very romantic dinner in the waiting room...Taco Bell! haha! I think it was our best Valentine's Day yet! :)

A Quick Update

2009-02-10T12:39:00.000-08:00

Things are going well this week. Here are some pictures and a quick update on everyone.

George, not happy...they were checking his nose to make sure the CPAP isn't irritating it too much:
My cute baby boy!

George is doing well on the CPAP. We have been able to hold him every day! He loves Kangaroo Care...he snuggles right into us...he's so sweet! He is 3lb, 6oz...most of his swelling from the surgery has gone down too.

Sweet little Emery in her big girl gown:

This is a preemie gown, up to 5lbs!

Emery is still amazing us. She is such a strong little girl! They removed her PICC line yesterday! She is 2lb, 13oz. We "practiced" breast feeding for the first time today and she latched on for a little bit...she kept "smiling" at me...oh such a cutie!

Our little blondie, Elaina:

Oh so sweet! She had pulled out her feeding tube and we couldn't resist taking advantage of the photo-op! Look at those little lips!

Lainey is such a strong little girl. Her latest ultrasound was "stable", which is great. The ventricles are not getting bigger as of yesterday. They don't expect to see improvement at this point, so stable is the best thing we could hope for! They will do another u/s on Thursday. Lainey has "practiced" breast feeding twice now, and latched on both times. She does really well too! She is 3lb, 3oz.

Here are some new Kangaroo Care pictures too.

Ryan held both girls at the same time the other night for the very first time. They didn't really seem to aware the other was there...they snoozed the whole time. Emery is on the left, Lainey on the right. You could really see the differences in them when they are right next to eachother. Emery's hair in photos looks lighter than it is in person. Lainey is very blonde, Emery is more dark blonde/light brown. Both are 100% adorable though!! :)

Daddy and his little buddy:

Mommy and George:

Daddy and the girls:

I will do my best to update again on Thursday or Friday!

No More Vent!!!

2009-02-07T16:13:00.000-08:00

I can't seem to get the pictures in order, but who cares!?!? Our little boy is off the ventilator and now has his CPAP!!! We were at the hospital last night and they were going to do another blood gas and it was so good the doctor decided to take him off the vent!!!

Here he is with his CPAP:
This is just as they took the vent out:

Just before they took the vent out (mommy is so happy!):

George's gorgeous little face without anything on it:

The last picture with his ventilator:

His new CPAP:

We were so happy to be there for this! I think George is going to be quite the ladies man...he already has all the nurses in the NICU wrapped around his little finger! So many of them came up to us this morning saying how excited they were that he is making such great progress now! Daddy even got to hold his little boy today for the first time...what an awesome moment! We both had tears!

Off to visit our little angels now!!!

Two Week Update

2009-02-05T14:36:00.001-08:00

Wow! I can't believe it has been 2 weeks since we became a family of five! Here is an update on everyone.
Lainey:

Lainey is doing great! She is just about back up to her birth weight and is on "full feeds" which for her weight is 25cc's. Her feeds are being fortified, which means they are basically beefing up my breastmilk so she is getting more calories. Her PICC line is being removed today too...no more IV's!!! She is back on the nasal canula and having fewer breathing events...though she likes to pull her canula out and suck on it. It is so cute, she puts it in her mouth and just looks around like, "who? me?! I didn't do it!" She has been very alert lately too, opening her beautiful eyes...still not sure what color they will be though. She is starting to fill out now, but is still a teeny little pumpkin!

Emery:

Emery is also doing so well! She is off the nasal canula, on room air now! She still has her PICC line, but hopefully that will be gone in a few days. She is a couple days behind her sister on feedings because she was on medication to close her PDA and they halted her feedings for 36 hours. She is up to 10cc's and they will go up 2cc's every day until she is at full feeds. She is also almost back to her birth weight. She is a feisty little girl! She likes to snooze, but when you do something she doesn't like, oh boy, she will let you know! But she is easy to soothe and I love that I have the ability to soothe her!

George:

This is how George's isolette has been since his surgery. It has been important for him to be left alone to heal...it is hard to see him like that and not be able to do anything for him. As hard as it is, the best thing we can do for him is to leave him be right now...it is a very helpless feeling for us as his parents.

We were able to sneak in a quick picture of him...he is still pretty out of it, they have been keeping him on morphine for pain. Poor little guy has so many pokeys in him right now. We were delightfully surprised today though. When we got to the NICU we saw that he is off the oscillator and on a regular ventilator again! This is a step in the right direction. He is getting steroids now too for his blood pressure, I think he has one more dose. A side effect of the steroid is that it can also help to clear his lungs...a good side effect! His x-rays have been showing improvement. He is still very puffy from all the fluids, but hopefully this time next week, he will be good as new and showing us what is real personality is really like! The doctor said that if he has a good night tonight, she'd like for us to hold him tomorrow!!!

Here is a picture of the oscillator that he was on until today...it is very "industrial" sounding. We are glad to see it go, that is for sure!

I know some of you are really wanting to visit right now. With George healing slowly, we hope you understand our reasons for holding off visits. Hopefully next week we can have a few more visitors, but right now, his recovery is the most important thing.

Oh, and Lainey's cranial ultrasound on Tuesday showed that the bleeding has stopped but the ventricle is enlarged. There will be another u/s tomorrow to see if the ventricle is getting larger or smaller. They will also make sure the spinal fluid is flowing ok. I will update when we get the results of the ultrasound.

We are exhausted but that's ok. We couldn't be happier to have our babies here and getting stronger. I'm sure it's nothing compared to when they come home! haha!

George's Surgery

2009-02-02T08:28:00.000-08:00

Just a quick update to let everyone know that George is out of surgery. It went very well. He is still "out" right now and will be for pretty much the entire day. He is on an oscillator right now, which is a step higher than a ventilator. It keeps his lungs pretty much fully inflated, since he is a little too sick to breathe right now and his vent settings were pretty high. So hopefully he will only be on that a couple of days. The doctor said he should be like a new baby in about 48 hours. Thank you for all the prayers for us and our little angels. It is so appreciated!

I will update tomorrow after Lainey's cranial ultrasound too. Now, off to take a nap...neither one of us got much sleep last night!

More Prayers, Please

2009-01-30T22:02:00.000-08:00

Our babies all had cranial ultrasounds today, well I guess it was yesterday since it is 1am now! Anyway, George's and Emery's both came back normal. Elaina's showed Intraventricular Hemorrhage or IVH. IVH has 4 grades, Grade I being the least severe and Grade IV being the most severe. Her doctor said hers is uncomplicated Grade II, which means there is a small amount of bleeding on the brain without hydrocephalus. The information we received says that Grade I and Uncomplicated Grade II IVH are usually not at any greater risk of brain injury than premature infants who do not develop IVH. The bleeding is usually reabsorbed by the body. She will have another cranial ultrasound on February 3. Please keep our little girl in your prayers (along with her brother and his surgery on Monday) that the IVH does not worsen and that the repeat ultrasound shows the blood is being or has been reabsorbed.

We have had an emotional day. I knew there would be ups and downs with 3 babies in the NICU, but there isn't anything that can be said or that you can read on other peoples blogs that can really prepare you for it. I know my friends, old and new, that have been in this position have a lot of words of encouragement. Hearing about their experiences and seeing the beautiful faces of their little ones on the other side of all of this is so inspirational. I hope to be able to "pay it forward" when our family is on "the outside" and all of this is a memory.

Updates

2009-01-30T14:30:00.001-08:00

Our little boy, so handsome! George has had some struggles since his arrival. Mainly a condition called PDA or Patent Ductus Arteriosus (google it if you want more info). The short version of this is that he has a vessel near his heart that in full term babies closes up on it's own with the first breaths/cries. George's PDA has not closed after 2 rounds of medication. After a repeat ultrasound, we found out today that our little guy has to have surgery to close it. The surgery will most likely be on Monday early morning. They will do a repeat echo on Sunday just to see if by some miracle, the vessel is closing on it's own. The surgery is routine, but I think the word "routine" goes out the window when it is on your own little boy, especially when that little boy doesn't even weigh 3 pounds (though he is very close!). Hopefully after he recovers he can get rid of that ventilator and he will grow big and strong!

Don't let her little size fool you! She was the first baby off the ventilator, graduated to a CPAP and now finally a nasal canula and has been holding steady! She is the first one we were able to hold. I think she is going to be our cuddler too! Her cry is very soft and sounds like a little kitty cat...her daddy calls her "kitten"! He finally has a kitten he isn't allergic to! She continues to get stronger every day!

Our biggest and first born! She started all of this when she broke my water! She too is a strong little girl...first to go off the CPAP to a nasal canula. However, our little blondie was having some breathing "episodes" quite frequently so she earned her CPAP back. The great news is she has only had a couple of episodes since going back on CPAP. Basically, she was "forgetting" to breath from time to time and sometimes she'd recover on her own and sometimes she needed to be reminded by a nurse or us. Her little cry sounds like a billy goat, but don't worry...no nicknames of billy or goat! haha! Though she did look a little like Benjamin Button the other day...that nickname won't stick either. Probably blondie, if she has a nickname at all. Her daddy never imagined he would have a blonde baby!

As for us, we are hanging in there! Our days basically consist of going to the hospital in the morning for a few hours, coming home to rest, eat & pump (well me at least!) and then going back up to the hospital for a few hours in the evening. We thank God every day for our precious little miracles. Sometimes it still doesn't seem real. Last night I was thinking, "are they gonna really let us take you all home someday?!" It is the most amazing feeling in the world...it makes all the heartache that it took to get here just melt away. We both feel so full of love, like we never imagined! Thank you everyone for all your kind words and support. I'd love to be able to respond to all the comments individually, but there isn't much time right now...just know we are so appreciative!

"Kangaroo" pictures

2009-01-30T13:59:00.000-08:00

One or both of us have finally been able to hold our babies! Ryan has not yet held Elaina, but hopefully, that will change tonight. He did hold George, though only for a moment. Unfortunately George wasn't tollerating going from Mommy to Daddy today and we had to put him back into his isolette. It was just a little too much for him.

Here are some pictures of us with the babies:

Mommy and Elaina:

Mommy and Emery "Kangarooing":

Mommy and Daddy with Emery:

George and Mommy "Kangarooing":

Emery Kangarooing on Daddy:

Kangaroo Care is skin to skin with the babies. We haven't been able to Kangaroo with Elaina yet because she has a umbilical line, which is very fragile while her brother and sister have PIC lines. Hopefully Elaina's veins will cooperate and she can get her PIC line soon too so we can Kangaroo with her. It is so good for the babies (and us!)...it is just this closeness you feel that words can't really express. Doesn't get any better than holding these little ones!

First, A Slight Rewind

2009-01-30T13:46:00.000-08:00

Since I never got to post these, I figured I would play a little catch-up. These are the last belly pictures we have. Taken on January 18th at 29 weeks...4 days before the babies arrived.

Day 2 Update

2009-01-24T23:25:00.000-08:00

After a whirlwind 2 days, everyone is doing just fine.

Elaina- Our first, and biggest baby is doing well, but has had a few issues that are being addressed. she is off the ventilator, but is now wearing a cpap mask to steady her breathing. She has had a few episodes where she forgets to breath, so they are treating her with caffeine to stimulate her. It has been working great. The doctor noticed a heart murmur and it was discovered that she has a vessel still open that should have closed when she was born. this is somewhat common in preemies and they have decided to just observe for 2 days to see if it closes on its own. If not, there is a medicine treatment available with a 2/3 success rate. She's a fighter, so we are hoping for the best. Either way they assured us that it will be corrected one way or another. We are praying for her. She is also under uv light to treat her jaundice. Also very common. she has beautiful blond hair and looks like mommy.

Emery- Our second, and tiniest baby is doing surprisingly well. She was the first off of her vent and also has the cpap apparatus to help her regulate breathing. She is feisty, but looks so sweet and is just tiny. She is also under uv light treatment for jaundice, but otherwise is doing very well. We think she is a little milkshake of mommy and daddy.

George- Our third born is still on his ventilator, but the nurses are working to ween him off... It is common for boys to take a little longer in the breathing department. He's just working a little too hard to come off yet... He pulls at his tubes alot, but seems to like being on his tummy, so that is how he is spending most of his time lately. He is also under uv light treatments for jaundice. He is also a feisty little guy with a strong grip. He has big hands and feet like daddy. Everybody says he is 100% boy. He has little black curly hair, and we think he looks more like daddy, but who knows at this point...

Mommy- Mommy is being a trooper. She has some pretty bad swelling of her extremities, but no complications from surgery. She gets to visit the babies a few times a day, but unfortunatley, they are not ready to be held yet, which is a bit hard to handle. Hopefully we'll get to hold them in the next day or two once they are a bit more stable and adjusted to being in the real world.

Daddy- Daddy is running on adrenaline still. Not much sleep, but hopefully tonight will be better.

We appreciate everyones thoughts and prayers during this emotionally and physically draining time. We've had lots of visitors and enjoy showing off our new family. Mommy will be coming home on Monday, but I'm sure we'll be visiting our little babies often. Our lives have a new purpose, and we wouldn't have it any other way. It's been a long time coming and we plan on giving them our all.

More pictures and updates to come. Stay tuned...

Surprise, Surprise, Surprise!!!

2009-01-24T23:05:00.000-08:00

George Ryan Kolb- 2lb. 14oz. Emery Ruth Kolb- 2lb 8oz

Elaina Dee Kolb- 3lbs. 0 oz.

Mommy during delivery- She did great!

Getting ready for surger prep...

On January 22, 2009 we received the 3 most beautiful little miracles. Exactly 12 hrs. before our scheduled routine doctors appointment, at 3:30am, Lisa's water broke. Dr. Bryant told us to go to the birth center for observation. After almost hitting a deer on the way to the hospital (my heart is still skipping beats...) we finally made it in around 4:15am. There were no contractions, so the doctors gave lisa a steroid shot to strengthen the babies lungs just in case they had to be born, but the hope was to keep them in for a couple days, if not longer. Elaina had another idea... Lisa started having contractions and by the time dr. bryant arrived, they got stronger and he noticed that she was dialated to 5cm. Baby Time! At 10:03am, our first little miracle was born. Elaina Dee Kolb weighed exactly 3lbs. At 10:04, Emery Ruth Kolb arrived at 2 lbs 8oz. Also at 10:04, George Ryan Kolb arrived, weighing 2lb. 14oz. There were no complications, but due to the fact that they were only 29 weeks and 4 days along, their little lungs needed help. They were all put on ventilators, but were otherwise healthy and moving around. We had a big crowd in the waiting room including both sets of grandparents, Ryan's brother, sister and sister-in laws and Ryan's aunt faith and uncle dave. After a few hours, I was able to take everyone in to see lisa and also get a quick peek at the tiny little babies. Everyone was in awe over how tiny they are and how perfect they looked. They are truly little miracles. After 3 years of heartache, God has finally blessed us and we are truly humbled.

Thank You

2009-01-19T06:46:00.000-08:00

Thank you, everyone, for your encouraging words. I do feel like I have been complaining a lot and yesterday I had a melt down. I guess a little one on Saturday too. Saturday, we were getting ready to go to our nephews 2nd birthday party. I put on some jeans that were previously comfortable. By previously, I mean earlier that week. Well, now the water retention is so bad that my legs from mid thigh down are crazy swollen. I caught a glimpse of my self in the mirror, au naturale, and seriously, I look like Buda! So, these previously comfy jeans gave me sausage legs now. So, that was bad enough...then I asked Ryan to help me put on my Ugg boots. These boots have been the only thing I can wear on my feet (besides my slippers) for over a month now. Well, we got them on and they hurt sooo bad. I had to have him take them off immediately. That is when the water works started. Ryan cleared a path for me to get to the car (gotta love all this darn snow) so I could just wear my slippers over to the party. I made it through the rest of the evening.

Yesterday, upon waking up at 7am, I was hoping to see the swelling go down a little bit. I think it is here to stay until after the babies are born. I find myself looking at the calendar searching for the closest date these babies can be born safely, even thinking, "they would be ok if they were born at 30 weeks" or 31, etc. Enter second meltdown. Around midnight. Poor Ryan wakes up on the couch to his wife crying, yet again. I was overcome with guilt about even thinking that! All these babies need is for me to put on my big girl panties (well, actually literally too!) and suck it up and be a good mom. They NEED more time inside me. That is my job right now, to do what is best for them, swollen legs, carpal tunnel and everything else...I need to focus on what is best for them...not me. It's not about me anymore, it's about them and what they need. I know I will be a good mom, but last night, maybe blame hormones, I don't know, I was really starting to doubt myself about this. I want them out so I can be comfortable again...but not at the sake of their well being and health. I need to focus on that. I have made it to 29 weeks...I can do this for at least 4 more weeks, right?

So, thank you again for all of your encouraging words...it truly means the world to me!

28 Week Update

2009-01-17T10:58:00.000-08:00

28 Weeks!!! This is a big deal when you are pregnant with triplets. My doctor said that at 28 weeks, they consider you to be in the "safe zone". Survival of triplets born at 28 weeks is excellent and usually without any major/long term complications. Yes, they would spend quite a bit of time in the NICU, but the big picture is very good. My goal is to still make it to at least 33 weeks.

Here is the covered 28 week belly picture:
Big 28 week belly:

Bare 28 week belly:

This week I have become increasing less comfortable. The water retention has worsened...my legs feel like bruised tree trunks! I have started sleeping in the family room on the LaZBoy as it seems to be the most comfortable. Actually, any sleeping position has it's pros and cons these days. In the recliner, George and Emery have taken to wedging themselves right under my ribs and into my lungs, which can be both painful and hard to breathe. Sleeping in bed, I don't have the "burrowing" that comes with sleeping in the recliner, but about every hour the hip of the side I am sleeping on starts to throb so I have to roll over to the other side. Speaking of rolling over, I never realized what a feat this really is! There is no more of the quick easy half asleep side to side manuever...it is a process. 1) remove the pillow supporting your belly, 2) remove the pillow between your knees, 3) remove blankets, 4) gradually try to roll to your back, 5) make sure all babies are "ok" with these movements, if not, they will let you know!, 6) slowly ease onto the opposite side, 7) reposition pillow between knees, 8) reposition pillow under belly, 9) pull up covers again, did I mention the carpal tunnel yet...not yet? see below, 10) get all adjusted, 11) realize you have to pee.

I have also developed carpal tunnel. I am now wearing braces during the night. This helps a little bit, so far. My hands are still a little sore in the morning, I call it "prenatal arthritis"! But if I have to grab or adjust any pillows or blankets in the middle of the night, I have to get creative as my thumbs seem to hurt the most.

At our last doctors appointment we scheduled our c-section for 3/9/09. Our nurse does seem to think that we will have February babies though. She said she thought 4 more weeks, this was 5 days ago.

So now that I feel as though I have complained this entire post, I have to reitterate that I feel incredibly blessed. After 3 1/2 years of trying to get pregnant we are so blessed to have these 3 little miracles growing inside me. I wouldn't change anything. As much as I feel "ready" to be done, I know they need more time to grow. I will do my best to be patient and grin and bear it!

And, last but not least, The 27 Week Belly

2009-01-07T10:38:00.001-08:00

Ok...I think this will get the blog up to date! Here are belly pics from earlier this week (27w1d to be exact!)

It is funny, I have been getting a lot of people lately asking me, "when are you due?" When I tell them I have at least another 5-8 weeks to go the look on their faces is priceless! It gets even better when I tell them I am having triplets! haha! I am measuring over full term if there was only one baby in there. Ryan is baffled that I don't have stretch marks (knock on wood!). Wouldn't it be wonderful if it stays that way!?!?! I am slathering on the cocoa butter at least twice a day...I hope my diligence pays off!

Latest Ultrasound Pics

2009-01-07T10:14:00.000-08:00

We had our latest ultrasound on December 30th. All the babies were doing great! Here are the latest pictures! We have also had a slight change in the middle names.

Triplet 1, Elaina "Lainey" Dee, profile, 26w2d:
Triplet 1, Elaina "Lainey" Dee, face (on right, belly on left with her arm up on top), 26w2d:

Triplet 2, George Ryan, profile, 26w2d:

Triplet 2, George Ryan, face (on left, belly on right, he's also waiving), 26w2d:

Triplet 3, Emery Ruth, profile, 26w2d:

Triplet 3, Emery Ruth, face (on left, belly on right, you can see her eye!), 26w2d:

The babies were also measured on this day.
Lainey - 2lbs 3oz
George - 2lbs
Emery - 2lbs 1oz
They are all so close in size which is great!

Other than that, I still have cankles, sleep is getting to be a challenge and I'm not feeling very "pretty" but it is all worth it and I can take it! I wouldn't change a thing and I am in awe every day at this big belly and the fact that there are THREE BABIES in there! I wonder if that ever seems "real"?!? haha!

Christmas pictures/Belly shots

2009-01-07T09:54:00.001-08:00

I know I am WAAAYYY behind on pictures...here are a few from Christmas day...I was 25 weeks 4 days:

Ryan and I (I don't think he can get his arms around the big belly!):

Belly to belly (hehehe!):

Since we won't be able to have more belly shots with Thor (sniff sniff) here is the last picture I have of Thor, with his cousin Georgie (clearly, she doesn't like attention on other dogs!):

A Very Sad Goodbye

2009-01-03T11:50:00.000-08:00

Last Saturday, well I guess Sunday as it was after midnight, we had to put our beloved dog, Thor, to sleep. I have had Thor for just over 13 years. He was a member of the family and a best friend. I try to find comfort in knowing that he didn't suffer long. It all started the evening after Christmas Day. Thor seemed a little "off" at bedtime, but I figured it was from all the excitement of the day and all the people that were at our house for Christmas. Around 3am, he woke me up...he was pacing the upstairs hallway and he usually sleeps thru the night on his favorite dog bed in our room. I woke Ryan up and told him the dog needed to go outside. When he put Thor outside, he was retching, but couldn't throw up. Ryan called me downstairs and said something was wrong. Thor's stomach was very distended. I called the emergency vet and they said to bring him in immediately and that it sounded like a condition called "bloat". At the vet, they confirmed that Thor had bloat. Basically, the stomach overturns on itself cutting off the blood supply to his vital organs and filling the abdomen with gas. The vet gave Thor a 50/50 chance of surviving the procedure (putting him under, passing a tube down his throat into his stomach, removing the contents and then manipulating the stomach back to normal). She said he could need surgery to remove parts of his stomach and possibly his spleen. We both agreed that given his age, such a surgery could be more traumatic to him. We ok'd the first procedure. We had an emotional goodbye with our good boy and went home. The vet called me at 6am and said Thor tollerated the procedure very well and that his spleen was slightly enlarged, but was shrinking. She said he still wasn't out of the woods and still gave him a 50/50 chance of recovery. At 9am they called and said he was still sedate, but was improving. Around 6pm we got another call and he was still improving. They would try to re-introduce food and water around 5am the next morning (Saturday). According to the treatment log, Thor was sleeping soundly and comfortably. I called Saturday around noon for an update and they said Thor was keeping food and water down and no signs of re-bloating. Then the best words came...we could pick him up later in the afternoon!

We picked Thor up around 2pm. He was so sad looking. He couldn't control his bladder in the lobby and when we got him outside he collapsed in exhaustion. We questioned if it was too early to take him home but we were told the best place for him to recover was at home. My dad came over to help Ryan get Thor inside. Still on his favorite bed, they had to use it like a stretcher to get Thor inside. We put his bed in front of the fireplace and turned it on. We both laid with him and gave him lots of "scrubs" (aka pet him). I had to feed him "meatballs" of moist dog food the vet sent us home with and give him water thru a syringe. I was only able to get him to eat the meatballs that had his meds in them and this was basically force feeding. He had no interest...anyone who knew Thor knows this is very out of character.

Ryan went to make an appearance at a friend of ours 30th birthday party and I stayed home with Thor. My mom and dad came over in case I needed help. Before Ryan left he tried a few times to get Thor up to go outside...he wouldn't budge. When Ryan got home, he tried again. It was as if Thor was paralyzed in his hind legs. His breathing was also starting to appear labored. We called the vet again and she recommended bringing him back in for reassessment. She said he should have been moving around by now. I was a mess...I just knew that if Thor went back, he wasn't coming home. My dad and Ryan went. I told them if it was bad, I wanted to be there. My dad called my mom a short while later. It wasn't good. Thor was in pain. His heart was beating about 3x's faster than it should have been. The vet told Ryan she could try some things that would maybe buy us up to 2 months with Thor. I knew the quality of his life would not be there and that it would be selfish on my part to make him suffer any longer. Ryan and my parents were worried about me and they all thought it was best that I didn't go up there. Ryan promised me he would stay with Thor the entire time and tell him how much I loved him. He did just that and gave him "scrubs" the whole time. Ryan said that once he passed, he seemed to "smile". It was one of the hardest decisions, but I know we made the right one for Thor.

The next few days were very sad and while we are still sad today, I had a sense of peace once Thor's ashes were back here with us. We will probably bury him on a hill in our backyard this spring, once the ground softens. We are dog sitting my sisters golden retriever as well...and we were when all of this started too. Having her here has helped a little, I think. She goes home today, so we'll see how we feel after she leaves. She keeps looking around for Thor. :(

So many people have been very supportive and we are so thankful for that. I know that Thor will be watching over his little brother and sisters when they arrive in this world. I only wish he would be here to greet them too.

Cankles or Kankles?!?!

2008-12-23T06:08:00.000-08:00

There seems to be a debate between my husband and I...is it "cankles" or "kankles"? Not that this is important (and yes, they are still there!) but my definition is this:
cankles - calf/ankle blends together...his is kankles - knee/ankle no definition between the two. Now, for the record, I still have ankles...they are just much bigger than my normal shapely little ones...hey, gotta take credit for whatever is still shapely...well, whatever is not the shape "round"! haha! Though, they aren't very shapely anymore, but oh well! The doctor still isn't concerned. I am taking it easy though. Especially after the holidays. Before the holidays I am resting up until we have to go to whichever celebration we are going to and when there, for the most part, I'm sitting down...sometimes with my feet up, depending on where we are!
Thanks, in advance, for your "vote" on this debate (I say this because I think I'm right...and I love being right!) :P

Cankles... :(

2008-12-16T06:40:00.001-08:00

I was doing quite a bit of running around yesterday (I thought I was being good...Ugg boots, no hard shoes or anything like that). I went to breakfast, did some light Christmas shopping with my sister, then lunch...home to rest for a couple of hours then off to my first MOMs meeting. When I got home and took my boots off, there they were....little puffy club feet and cankles. I had noticed before I got home that my "fat" ring and my watch were a little uncomfortable, I just figured I was a little warm and so they got snug. So, after a good nights sleep (well, relatively good!) my cankles are still very present. I called my nurse just to be on the safe side and she said to put my feet up for a couple of days (no running around like a crazy lady) and be mindful if I get a headache or heartburn, particularly on the right side. My blood pressure has been low the entire pregnancy so far so they aren't too concerned about preeclampsia...thank goodness! So, I'm downing lots of water today and catching up on TV shows saved on my Tivo. At least until about 4:00...we are having Christmas at my sisters house today because they will be out of town on Christmas. But I will just head over there and do more of the same!

Ultrasound and Update

2008-12-10T09:58:00.000-08:00

We had another ultrasound today. They also checked their weights today...Dr. Bryant said they are right in line, size wise, as a singleton would be at the same gestation.

Here is Lainey, top of her head and her hand:
Here is Lainey's face:

Here is George's profile with Emery's foot:

Here is George...his arms and hands, like he is clapping:

Here is Emery's face:

And the top of Emery's head...she is playing with her ear and covering her face with the other hand:

Now for the weights...Lainey is currently our big girl, weighing 1 lb. 7 oz. George is our peanut, weighing 1 lb. 4 oz. Emery is right in the middle at 1 lb 5-6 oz. So roughly 4 pounds of babies right now. I go back for my next appointment just before the new year.

Belly Pics

2008-12-08T07:05:00.000-08:00

Here are the latest views of my expanding mid section. These are 23 weeks (well, one day shy of 23 weeks if I'm being honest!) I have heard, "you're not that big!" (thank you for that, by the way!) But I have put on about 40 pounds so far! The doctor is very happy with my weight gain and the size of the babies (which they will measure them again at this weeks appointment on Wednesday). To those that have said I'm not that big...keep in mind, I'm not even technically in the third trimester yet! haha! You just wait! But I am loving every single minute of it!

I'm going to try to get a belly picture each week now, I think...

More Ultrasound Pictures

2008-12-08T06:50:00.001-08:00

We had our latest ultrasound last Monday (sorry late with the pictures!) So here are our little ones!
Emery, 22w1d:
George, 22w1d:

Elaina, 22w1d:

They were all doing really well. The doctor seemed surprised I was still doing really well getting around, etc. Ryan told him jokingly, "sorry we're not more exciting!" He replied, "boring is good in a triplet pregnancy!"

My First Shower!

2008-12-04T12:20:00.002-08:00

Here are pictures from my first shower, which was November 16 at the Sweet Afton Tea Room:
Mom, Dad and I:

Ryan and I:

Mom, me and Deanna:

Annie, Cindi (Ryan's mom), me, my mom and Deanna:

Cindi, Ryan and I:

Booboo (Isabella) and I:

Annie & I:

Blake getting a smooch:

The shower was beautiful. We had High Tea...everyone had their own pot of tea, then some savories and tea sandwiches followed by scones and dessert. Any time I have High Tea, I am surprised at how full you actually get! My mom and sister really outdid themselves! My mom made the most beautiful baskets which we "raffled off" to guests who brought a package of diapers. They were top of the line...I mean she could start a business with her baskets! It was so wonderful to be surrounded by so much love and support. Ryan and I have waited a long time to have this kind of shower thrown for us and it was made even more special by the attendees and the extremely generous gifts!

We are lucky enough to be looking forward to another shower this Saturday hosted by Ryan's mom and aunts! So, more pictures to come!

Hospital/NICU Tour

2008-11-26T06:37:00.001-08:00

Last week we went on our hospital tour. I was able to see the amazing LDR (Labor, Delivery, Recovery) rooms. Some of them have Jacuzzi tubs or Jacuzzi showers that have all these different nozzles to massage you everywhere. I know I will not be utilizing one of these rooms, but I told the nurse I'd love to come for a day for a little "vacation"! Then we saw the mother/baby unit. I have seen this before, when my nephew and neice were born years ago and most recently when my almost 2 year old nephew was born. I will be utilizing this room, however it is a bit of a bummer that most likely I won't be able to have my babies "room in" with me. The nurse that gave the Family Birth Center Tour gave us the name of another nurse who could give us a tour of the NICU. I wanted to see it first before our babies are in there...I thought it could make it easier that way. I am glad we did it. I mean, let's face it, these babies will most likely be in the NICU for some period of time. I have seen pictures of friends and their babies that have had to be in the NICU so I felt a little prepared. Ryan, on the other hand, was amazed at the little babies. I was glad he was able to see it. He made a comment that you see babies in the NICU on TV shows but you never really see the whole picture, the nurses, the 2 chairs for you to sit in while visiting, etc. It was good preparation for both of us. We were able to peek in and see a C-Section OR too. We met one of the neonatologists and many of the nurses. Hopefully if these babies do end up in the NICU, it will be for a short period of time, but whatever happens, at least we feel a little more prepared!

20 Week Belly Pictures

2008-11-18T08:13:00.001-08:00

As promised here are the latest belly pictures taken at 20w1d:

20 week ultrasound and update

2008-11-17T14:05:00.000-08:00

Today we had our Level II ultrasound. They measured all babies, checked their organs (all looked well), checked for cleft palates (none here) and things like club feet (none of this either). So the doctor was very pleased with everything. Here is a rundown of each baby:

Lainey, Triplet 1 - weighing about 13 ounces
Here's her spine:
profile:

another profile:

and her little face:

George, Triplet 2 - also weighing about 13 ounces
Here's his spine:

profile:

hand:

and face:

Emery, Triplet 3 - weighing about 14 ounces

Her spine:

profile (with someones arm by her head!):

feet (how cute is that?!):

and another profile:

I am gaining weight steadily and the doctor said while it can be shocking to see the number on the scale, I'm just where he'd want me to be. I also asked him to measure me today, to see how many weeks I'd be measuring if I was carrying a singleton...34 weeks!!! Wow!!!

We also had a baby shower yesterday...I will post pics soon...as well as a 20 week belly picture.

Ryan has also been able to feel all of the babies move. I feel them all the time now...boy, are they active!

Our cribs and changing table were delivered on Saturday, thanks to the generousity of both sets of our parents!!! It looks great! On Friday, my brother, dad and Ryan installed a new closet in the nursery too...it looks like if they wanted, they could have a new career! I'll post pics of that later too!

Looks like upcoming posts will include, belly pictures, shower and nursery! Yea! Stay tuned...

A Little Behind

2008-11-09T18:20:00.000-08:00

I mean that as a time frame because right now, my behind is anything but little!

Here are some belly shots from last week, 18 weeks pregnant (notice my belly button is a thing of the past!):

Getting big! Even bigger now...but I know it is nothing compared to what it will be!

Latest Ultrasound Pictures

2008-11-09T18:12:00.000-08:00

Here are a few pics from the most recent ultrasound:

Triplet 3, Emery, 18w5d, face and belly w/her arms up:
Triplet 2, George, 18w5d, profile:

Triplet 1, Lainey, 18w5d, profile:

They also did some measurements and Lainey and George are both about 9 ounces and Emery is leading the pack at 10 ounces! She likes to eat like her mommy! haha!

Next Monday we have our Level II ultrasound, I will be 20 weeks 1 day. They say it takes about 40 minutes per baby...long time on the table with a full bladder!

I am also having the first of 2 baby showers next Sunday! Can't wait...I'll be sure to post pictures!!!

More Ultrasound Pics

2008-10-29T09:24:00.001-07:00

Here are the new pics from today! We also confirmed that there is 1 boy and 2 girls...we saw all the "parts" today!

Triplet 1, girl, face:
Triplet 1, profile:

Triplet 2, boy, face:

Triplet 2, profile:

Triplet 3, girl, face:

Triplet 3, profile:

I am 17 weeks and 3 days today. The ultrasound tech said I have very active babies in there! I have been thinking that I have been feeling some "flutters" lately too. Yesterday however, I am pretty sure I felt a distinctive "poke" from someone. Just to my left of my belly button it felt like someone poked me in the stomach...it actually took my breath away for a second, like when something startles you. The doctor today said to expect a lot of that in the coming weeks!

Also, these aren't completely solidified, but the names we have right now are:

Baby 1 - Elaina "Lainey" Miller

Baby 2 - George Dee

Baby 3 - Emery Ruth

Ryan says he's not 100% sure about the middle names, but I am! haha! So, pretty sure this is how it will be...I'll let everyone know when we do know for sure though!

16 weeks down...hopefully 18-20 to go!

2008-10-20T07:25:00.000-07:00

Thor being a good boy posing for the bi-weekly picture:
Ok...he's had enough...he wants his dinner scoops!

It is hard to believe that I am 16 weeks pregnant! Well, 16w1d, but who's counting?! haha! It seems like such a short time ago we found out we were having triplets! I'm not complaining about the time going fast...every week gets us closer and closer to meeting our precious little ones...I'm not in too big of a hurry...they need to cook for as long as possible! We want healthy big babies that can come home to us ASAP!

We had a productive Saturday. We did a lot of organizing...R in his "man room" and me in my closet and the kitchen pantry. Doesn't sound like a lot, but it took a good part of the day! Next up, closet organizers in the "man room" and the nursery. Then I can take one or two more good days and feel like I have done what I need to get done. Oh, what a wonderful feeling that will be! My mom and sister have offered to help, thank goodness! Hopefully with their help I will even be able to get the window treatments up in the nursery! It will be so exciting to see that room take shape!

Breaking News!

2008-10-15T09:40:00.000-07:00

Here are the latest pictures of the babies! They will get measured at our next appointment, which is in two weeks. According to my calendar, they should be close to 6" now!

Triplet 1 (baby girl):
Triplet 2 (baby boy...yes, he showed us a weiner today!):
Triplet 3 (baby girl), face view, she wouldn't give us a profile...I think she will be the "ham" of the group! haha!:

Rewind...

2008-10-14T17:10:00.000-07:00

I just realized I forgot to post pictures from our last ultrasound on 10/3. We have another appointment tomorrow so I figured I should get these on here before I post the ones from tomorrow!

Triplet 3, face, 13w5d:
Triplet 3, profile, 13w5d:

All three, 13w5d:

Triplet 1, face, 13w5d:

Triplet 1, profile, 13w5d:
Triplet 2, face, 13w5d:
Triplet 2, profile, 13w5d:

I will post more tomorrow!

Belly Shots

2008-10-06T07:38:00.000-07:00

I figured I should post some belly shots to show the progression of "the belly".

8 weeks:
12 weeks:

14 weeks:

Wow...it's been a long time!

2008-09-23T16:42:00.000-07:00

I have no excuse for being absent other than pure laziness on my part! To catch up...we had a doctor's appointment yesterday and my doctor said I am in the second trimester! I wasn't sure exactly when that happened, since you are typically pregnant for 40 weeks, but not as long with a triplet pregnancy. Today I am 12w2d. At the appointment we had another ultrasound. The babies were all bouncing off the walls, so to speak. It was so cool to see them rolling and flipping all around...so much so that it was hard to get measurments on them! We finally did and they are all just under 3" crown to rump...and they look so much like babies! Check 'em out:

Triplet 1:

Triplet 2:

Triplet 3:

And the whole gang together:

Triplet 1 seems to like to have his or her picture taken...you can see #1 in both the other pictures (bottom right with Triplet 2 and top left with Triplet 3!) It makes it hard to figure out the third picture at first!

Other than that, I have gained 20 pounds so far (yikes!) but the doctor is very pleased with that. I am supposed to gain about 35 pounds by 20 weeks...so I have 8 weeks to put on 15 pounds! I am also meeting with a nutritionist on Thursday to make sure I'm doing/eating all that I should.

On a side note, Thursday is also our 4 year anniversary! We are celebrating by getting massages, going to a movie and out to dinner. I think what makes it most exciting is that we are doing this on a Thursday! haha!

My "Graduation"

2008-09-01T08:08:00.000-07:00

It is official...I have graduated from my RE (Dr. Schoolcraft). I got the call on Friday. They had been weaning me off the prometrium and estrace and my levels were holding strong on thier own, so I am officially just under the care of my new high risk doctor. I had my first appointment with him on Friday as well. We got to see all three babies again and they all looked great. He said he sees, "three very viable babies in there." That was a huge relief, to say the least! He gave me a book by Dr. Barbara Luke who is an RN and dietician in Miami Florida now, but she used to be at U of M here in Ann Arbor. Well, her book says that in a triplet pregnancy, the mother should put on about 35 pounds by 20 weeks. I am 9 weeks and have put on 5 pounds...I am trying...really, I am. I am eating more than I ever have. You would think it would be fun, but your stomach is only so big...if I fill it as much as my husband would like, I truly think I would throw up! There are some great recipes in the book too. I am going to try even harder to put on 30 pounds in the next 11 weeks (yikes)!! But whatever these babies need, I'll do it. I'm not concerned about losing the weight after they are here...I think the challenges of having 3 babies will aid in that conquest! Also, in this book, it says that the infants of mother's carrying triplets who follow this program have, on average, a 35% higher birth weight than the national average, which is 3lbs, 11oz. I would love to have these babies born weighing at least 5 pounds each!

Well, it is Labor Day...gonna go spend some QT with my hubby!

Three Times the Blessing!!!

2008-08-15T08:22:00.000-07:00

We had our first ultrasound yesterday. R said he wouldn't believe anything was in there until we had our ultrasound and he saw for himself. Well, imagine his surprise when he saw for himself...all THREE of them!!! His eyes were as big as saucers!! We saw three little beans, three little flickers of the most perfect little hearts and then, to our complete surprise, we were even able to hear all three heartbeats!!! Baby A's was 108/bpm, Baby B's was 111/bpm, and Baby C's was 108/bpm! Here they are in their very first photo op:

Holy Cow!

2008-08-05T13:07:00.001-07:00

People have been asking me a lot about how I'm feeling. (Note: I don't mind it one bit...bring it on...I've waited a long time to have people ask me!) I am feeling good. I get tired around mid-day. I have been getting a little "queasy" at times...not often...and if I eat a little something it subsides pretty quickly. The only other thing I am noticing (and so is my husband, believe me) is that my boobs are HUGE! Especially Big Righty! I think I'm gonna have to get some new bras soon...I'm spilling over 34D's! They are a little sore, but not too bad yet. R is enjoying the "fuller" me! haha!

Also, I had my estrogen and progesterone levels checked. They are where they want them to be. They aren't going to start weaning me yet, just to be safe. I am fine with that...I like safe! I go back next week for another check.

2nd Beta Results

2008-07-29T17:59:00.001-07:00

Well, today I had my second blood pregnancy test. They want to make sure the numbers are progressing the way they want. I think they want them to double (give or take) about every 48 hours. My levels on Sunday were 361...today they were 952!!! So that is very good!

The Big Day...The Big Test

2008-07-29T17:51:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday I had my first beta (blood pregnancy test). We had to be at the doctor's officce at 8 a.m., so it was an early day for a Sunday! After that, we went to breakfast at Big Boy. I put some feta cheese on my eggs, which I normally like and the smell made me nauseaus! Then we went home and both took naps. I could only sleep for about an hour. The nurse who took my blood said they would call the results into CCRM around 2:30.

Around 4:00 we still hadn't heard. So I called the after hours answering service and she patched me through to the back line of the office. The nurse there said, "we haven't had a chance to pull anyone's files yet, that's why we haven't called. I don't have your chart in front of me, so I don't know where you are in you cycle, but I have your results right here. Your beta is 361...is this your first test or second?" I said it was the first and she said, "oh my...well, we want to see it over 50, so that is very strong!" She told me to stay on my prometruim and estrace and after that everything is a blur as to what she said! Oh, I do remember at one point she said, "congratulations, you're pregnant! I love giving that news!" I was bawling, and R had no idea what was going on...he was sitting in the lazy boy and I had my back to him....all he knew was I was crying and he was saying, "what!?!?" All I could do was give him a thumbs up! He goes, "no shit?!" After I got off the phone with the nurse we were both crying on the couch hugging. Then I said, "oh, one thing though...my beta is pretty high...I think there is more than one in there!" Then we both just started cracking up!

After that, we went to his parents house (on the way I called my mom, who immediately started crying). At R's parents house, his whole immediate family was there. His dad said, "so, anything new?" and R goes, "no...anything new with you?" He's so mean! Then he said he thinks he should grow a mustache so he looks more "like a dad" in a few months! So everyone started crying again!

Then we went to my sisters, who didn't know anything yet...my parents were on thier way there but drove around for a while b/c my mom said she wouldn't be able to keep a poker face! Well, my sis was backing out of her driveway on her way to the grocery store. As soon as she saw us pulling up she threw the car into park and jumped out. As soon as she saw me she started crying and ran up to me saying, "you're pregnant!!!" So once again, I cried too! Then I went inside and told my nephew and niece they were gonna be cousins...they were so excited!

On our way home, I bought a home pregnancy test....I needed to see 2 lines...and I did..immediately!! yea! I am just on cloud nine! I called R's aunts with the news on Moday! We told his grandparents on Sunday and I called my aunt's and uncle. It is so hard to keep it secret right now b/c everyone knew we were going to CO..ideally I would have liked to keep it a little quiet for a while, but oh well!

Yea for pills!

2008-07-23T15:05:00.000-07:00

I had my estrogen tested yesterday and I am happy to say it is up again! The nurse said they want to see it around 300 and mine was 302. So that is a huge relief! My stomach is getting back to normal too, finally! Here is a picture of my tummy boo-boos before I was told I could stop...actually, this picture was taken about 12 patches before I was allowed to stop. The welts ended up to my belly button and on either side of it...not pretty!

Hormone Levels

2008-07-19T18:08:00.000-07:00

My nurse called yesterday after we got back to the hotel and said that my estrogen was too low. can't remember the numbers, but it was pretty low. So I am now taking an oral estrogen called Estrace. The fantastic news is...NO MORE PATCHES!!! My stomach looks like I was abducted by aliens and itches like you can't imagine! The itchiness actually has a tendancy to wake me from a sound sleep! I really hope they heal soon...before the itchiness of a stretching pregnant belly starts!

I hope the Estrace does the trick and helps these babies stick!

Rocky Mountain High

2008-07-19T17:43:00.000-07:00

We arrived in Denver 4 days ago for our FET. The day we arrived we just went grocery shopping, got settled into our hotel and then to dinner at Benihana. The following day, we decided to go to the water park. We had a lot of fun, despite the rain that kept threatening to fall! A friend of mine went to a water park before her FET and she now has beautiful 13 month old twins...I hope to follow in her footsteps!

The morning of the FET we had breakfast and then I went to the fitness center to work out a little. I wanted to do whatever I could to be tired for bedrest. On the way to CCRM I was feeling very anxious. I can't really remember feeling like this before any other transfer...it was intense. Soon after our arrival, I had my blood drawn to check my estrogen and progesterone levels. Then up to the second floor where the FET would be. The acupuncturist on staff that day came to get me around 10:40 am. I told her I have never looked so forward to acupuncture and a valium in my life! She laughed at my honesty! She was fantastic. I felt immediately calmed down with the first session...thank God! Then, after the needles came out she said she'd send the nurse in with my valium...yippee!! After that, the ultrasound nurse came in and said my bladder was very full so I was allowed to empty it a little...oh that was wonderful! haha! I felt so much better after that.

The doctor came in a short while later and got me "in position". While I was looking at the ultrasound screen I saw the door open, but didn't think much more about it other than, "uh, hello...who is that while my legs are up in the air?!" It was the embryologist with a big incubator carrying our babies. She showed us a picture of our embyros on a monitor. They were beautiful...even hatching! The transfer couldn't have gone any smoother. They were only out of the incubator for less than 20 seconds before they were back inside me...hopefully for the long haul!

After the transfer, I had the second part of my acupuncture treatment. I was so relaxed that I fell asleep. R told me I was snoring! haha!

So now here I am, day 2 of bedrest. R has been great waiting on my every whim. He even bought me a chick flick I've been wanting to see...maybe we will watch it tonight! I am technically off bedrest tomorrow. I am going to take it easy though. I think we may go to brunch at Mimi's. They don't have one in Michigan...it is probably a good thing or I'd be huge! Today he brought lunch from the Cheesecake Factory. If you have one near you and you have never tried the Mac n Cheese balls...you must! OMG, they are good!

I'd like to stay on bedrest until about 1pm tomorrow...that will be exactly 48 hours after the FET was completed. My best friend who lives in Colorado Springs is coming up with her family for dinner tomorrow. Then we are homeward bound on Monday morning.

Bedrest is boring, but I don't care. As long as I have a baby or babies to hold at the end of all this, then this lovely nest that has developed on the back of my head from laying down for so long will be more than worth it. Whenever I start to get really bored I think of my good friend who spent 13 weeks on bedrest and I know how lucky I am that it is only a couple of days and I suck it up!

Love is a Battlefield

2008-07-08T18:08:00.000-07:00

Thanks for the title, Pat Benetar! The love is for my little snowbabies...the battlefield, well that is still my abdomen. Today, when I removed the 3 patches from Sunday, thankfully I did not have any more blisters...just itchy welts. I got a call back from the nurse and the other form of estrogen they use is also a patch. I used this other patch once before and, while I didn't have the extreme reaction I had the other day, I still had a reaction. And the patches are about 4 times the size of the ones I have now! So, call it "motherly love" if you want, but if this is what my body needs to make a cozy environment for my babies, I will slather on the neosporin and deal with it! I suppose it is just yet another means to a happy ending! That all being said, I have 4 brand new patches on today and I will trade them for 4 fresh ones on Thursday! If the welts persist, I'm going to have to find some new real estate for them to reside...or we can just play checkers on my stomach to pass the time on bedrest!!

YEOUCH!!!!

2008-07-06T17:19:00.000-07:00

I have been on estrogen patches for a little over a week now and I have always had some irritation wherever I place the patches. Today, however, was a new kind of irritation. I have actually developed little blisters...they itch and hurt all at the same time. It is so not fun! I have a call into my nurse to see if I can do another form of estrogen. If this is what is best, I will tough it out, but if there is something that is just as effective, I am all for it! Here are some pics of my lovely tummy after removing the patches. (don't mind my bloatedness!)

This one is from later in the day...the blisters are the tiny little darker areas...the rest of the red area is like a little raised itchy welt.

Fun, huh?! I have 3 new ones on until I hear from the nurse...hopefully this was an isolated incident!

Yet One Step Closer...

2008-06-25T17:47:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I welcomed a visitor...my old friend, Aunt Flo. She hadn't visited since March, since I was on the lovely Lupron Depot, it kept her at bay. What does this mean, you ask? It means tomorrow I turn into a sticker-book (remember those?!). I'm already a pin-cushion, now I get to paste my abdomen with estrogen patches! It starts with one at a time and builds to four at a time! I will replace them with fresh "stickers" every other day. Should make for some fantastic tan lines!! Not that anyone really sees my tummy (we have a pool so I am only really in a bathing suit at my own house!) but it will be interesting! If anyone catches a glimpse, they will think I 1-need to quit smoking, 2-am trying to lose weight, 3-am on that new birth control and maybe just a 4th for good measure! haha!

I am excited to be yet another step closer!!

Getting close...

2008-06-19T08:26:00.001-07:00

A friend reminded me yesterday that it was only a month til my FET! I hadn't really thought about it much, believe it or not! HOLY COW...it is only 4 weeks from Friday! For anyone who has ever gone thru IVF, you will understand the feelings one has before a cycle. You try to be "cautiously optimistic". You want to follow "The Secret" and say/think things like, "I am going to be pregnant this summer!" but all the while you have that little nagging voice in the back of your brain saying, "It's ok if this one doesn't work...you have 9 frozen embryos...you can try again." Or my favorite, "We will be parents one way or another...whether or not biology is there doesn't matter." And it doesn't matter...it is just that we were ready to be parents 3 years ago. When we "removed the goalie from the net" in January 2005, we had the mindset of, if it happens right away, great. If it takes some time, you know like 6 months or so, that is ok too. Well, here we are, 3 1/2 years later and ready for our 5th IVF attempt. I know everything is so much more "in line" this time around. We have a new doctor, we had more tests, we got answers, went thru treatment and now here we are at the edge once again, ready to jump with all of our hopes and dreams packed up in our "parachute" praying that this is the time it actually opens and we can embrace the thrill of the ride. To say this is an emotional time barely scratches the surface. There are times of giddy excitement filled with hope and times of being scared to death. But I know the moment I hear the words, "congratualtions, you're pregnant!" all that we had to do to get there will be a memory. I have met some amazing women during this time, and for that, I wouldn't change a thing! Oh boy...here we go........

A whole new day

2008-06-06T09:04:00.000-07:00

I am feeling much better today. Thank you, B, for your comments! I think I am affected more by the weather than I realize. When I wrote the previous post, it was dreary and rainy here. Today it is sunny and on it's way to 90 degrees. We are also going out for a nice dinner tonight, which we rarely seem to go anywhere that is not a Coney or the equivelant anymore! If I want to go out for a nice meal, it is usually with the girls!

I just wanted to thank everyone who is a wonderful support to me. I cherish you all so much!

My Pity Party

2008-06-04T16:19:00.000-07:00

Well, I guess when it rains, it pours! I haven't posted much lately and now here I am...2 in one day!

I've been feeling kind of lonely lately. I feel that I am in this alone for this cycle. Of course, my husband has been absolutely wonderful, but he's a guy, ya know!? Over the last 2 years I have become very close with a group of women I met on babycenter. They have been a great source of support. I am now the last one of the group that has not gotten pg. This is a lonely place to be! Many of them are celebrating their babies 1st birthdays, some are planning this milestone and some have very new babies at home. I feel like I don't want to "rain on their parades" with my upcoming cycle. There are some "newbies" on the board too that are currently pg. While I am so happy for them, I don't have that same closeness that I have with our original group. It makes it hard to visit that board, so I seldom do. I am officially the LAST ONE and it kind of sucks!

I know that these women that I speak of would hate to know that I feel this way and I know they are always there to support me. I know they pray for my miracle to happen. I just feel like such a downer and they have all this wonderful stuff happening right now. It is hard to write this with out getting teary. I have heard of "pregnancy guilt" (when one of us gets pg while another hasn't yet) but is there such a thing as "not-yet-pregnant guilt"?! I feel guilty talking about my sob story and poor me moods while they are experiencing such joy.

Well, my aforementioned dear husband is waiting for me in the other room to have some QT with me...I guess I will conclude this particular pity party and go join him.

So far, so good...

2008-06-04T08:38:00.000-07:00

Well, about a week ago I got a call from my nurse. I had emailed her wondering if we had been "forgotten" since it had been about 9 weeks since our egg retrieval and they told us we'd have our genetic test results in 4-6 weeks. I had heard that the testing was taking longer than they had originally told us, so I was trying my best to exercise patience. When we had met with the genetic counselor, she had told us that if we had 50% "normal" that that is fantastic (not just us...that is an across the board statistic). Well, out of our 11 frozen embryos, we have 9 that are considered "normal"!! That is greater than 80%!!! Of course, we are thrilled with the news.

Also, I am officially DONE with Lupron Depot! Now I am on birth control pills to regulate me. I will start lupron shots on June 17th. Then, on June 27 (roughly) I will add estrogen patches and baby asprin. Around July 13th I will add progesterone, Medrol and Tetracycline. My estimated FET is July 18th. I think I may need a seperate planner to keep all the drugs straight!

We are rather busy with wedding showers, graduations and graduation parties, and even a little traveling between now and our FET...hopefully it will help make the time fly by! In case I haven't mentioned before, I am ready to get pg!!

The Bitch Is In

2008-05-05T16:36:00.000-07:00

Yes, that's me...I got my 2nd Lupron Depot shot on Friday and with that, it seems a whole new batch of hormones have surfaced. Today, apparently I am very easily annoyed. Some of the people I have talked with today, I'd like to snap thier little heads right off thier shoulders...remember when you were a kid and you'd take a dandelion, "mama had a baby and her head popped off!"? I'm kinda feeling like that today! I'm pretty sure I know what triggered these thoughts...but I can't really say...trying to be respectful and a lady, I suppose! I am back home now, in my secure little world with my fur-baby. Ryan is out of town, so it is just Thor and I. I am currently practicing my deep breathing, a la meditation. It is starting to help. I guess I should go catch up with some work emails, etc so that I can just chill and try to become "normal" again. Wish me luck!

Emotions at an all-time high

2008-04-28T19:27:00.000-07:00

It has been 5 1/2 weeks since my ER. I was told the microarray tests were taking about 5 weeks. I am, by nature, a realtively patient person. Well, I guess it is better to say I don't get nervous/anxious about things until they are right in front of me. At my wedding I was calm as could be right up to the point that my dad and I reached the door of the church and I heard the music playing. Then I was like, "whoa...this is happening!" So now, knowing that I could find out the fate of my 11 embryos at any minute...I am climbing the walls! I mean, this is a huge deal! I mean, I have 11 potential babies and I am waiting to hear how many of them have a real chance of becoming a living, breathing extension of Ryan and I. It is hard to fight back tears while typing this (thanks a lot, Lupron Depot!).

Speaking of this hormone pumping thru my body...I have not had a good nights sleep in what seems like forever! I suppose I could look at it like I should get used to it, because once a baby, or babies, are here I won't get much sleep. I have had wicked hot flashes! One second I am sweating so much my clothes are starting to get damp, so I kick off all the covers. Then what seems like minutes later, I am shivering! It just sucks, but if it gets me pregnant, so be it. I honestly can't remember if I posted about this before...another side effect, forgetfulness!

I could go on...my thoughts just go in circles in my head. Basically, I am emotional like I can't remember ever being, sweating my butt off (if only it was literally) and I jump every time my darn phone rings in anticipation of learning the fates of our "babies".

On a good note, a new friend of mine, that I met out in Colorado, shared with me today that she is pregnant! I couldn't be more thrilled for her! Hopefully next summer our little ones can have a well-deserved "play date"!

Snowbabies, etc...

2008-03-31T15:34:00.001-07:00

Snowbabies, Grandsickles, Neice and Nephbrios...whatever you want to call them...we have 11 of 'em!! Our official count is in. 11 embryos have been biopsied and vitrified. Vitrified is a new thing they are doing to freeze the embryos. Typically, when freezing embryos in the U.S., they will take the embryo down in stages until it is frozen. My doctor went to China to research this new technology in freezing. I believe the lab at CCRM is the only one in the states that uses vitrification at this time. The embryos are basically "flash frozen" (think of your frozen veggies..."flash frozen for freshness") rather than taken down in stages. The "old" way usually has about a 70% survival rate when they thaw the embryos. With vitrification, there is greater than 90% survival rate with many couples not losing a single embryo. And after they are thawed, they look just as good as embryos from a fresh cycle! The biopsies have been sent to a lab in New Jersey. Currently, they are the only lab doing Micro-Array, the genetic testing we are having done. The results should take about 5 weeks. I will start depot-lupron tomorrow or the next day. So we're cookin' (as Uncle Neal would have said!).

MORE DENVER

2008-03-24T06:56:00.000-07:00

Off the subject of IVF, Denver was actually pretty fun. My mom was with me Monday thru Saturday. She has never been to Denver, but more than that, it was awesome to just have some one-on-one mother/daughter time. We went to our share of malls (there are plenty in Denver!) and a "road trip" to Colorado Springs to visit my bff and her family. We watched chick flicks, ate and just hung out. It was perfect!

While there, I also met a new friend. I was waiting for a blood draw one day and we started chatting for a few minutes. Then I saw her later at acupuncture. We quickly realized we had a lot in common...her last name is my maiden name, we both have PCOS, her mom's name was going to be my mom's name (long story, involves the movie Mildred Peirce!) and we were both from Michigan and go to the same acupuncurist here too! She is very sweet and I know this was not the last I will see of her!

Then Ryan got to Denver on Saturday. By this point I was starting to get a bit uncomfortable and "full" feeling. We still did a lot though. We took another trip to Colorado Springs, went to the U.S. Mint, more malls and more eating! ha! I was exhausted most of the time at this point and took almost daily naps...which I never do! I just could not keep my eyes open mid-afternoon!

All in all, it was a good trip...the weather was to die for! 50's-70's and sunny every single day but one! It was good to come home and see the rest of our family and our dog, Thor, but we flew in to a snow storm, yup, in late March! But it is still good to be home!

MY TRIP TO OZ

2008-03-24T06:39:00.000-07:00

Whew...I am back from Denver. What a whirlwind that was! I had my egg retrieval...28 eggs!! Of the 28, 27 were mature and 26 fertilized. I spoke with John, the embyrologist, yesterday for my "day 3 update" of our "babies". Of our 26, they have all divided (grown). They would like to see them between 6 and 8 cells on day 3. 13 of ours are 6-8 cells...the othe 13 are only slightly behind. John said that this does not mean that they won't "catch up". We will get another update on day 5 and/or 6. At that time, they will remove some cells for genetic testing. The cells they will remove will come from what will be the placenta...not from the mass that will become the baby. The genetic counselor told me, or prepared me, that it is common for many of the embryos to be "abnormal" and to not feel like something is wrong with us.

I did get a little "sick" after my ER. By sick, I mean OHSS (Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome). It was a mild case...I had it much worse with my first cycle. What happens is, after ER, free fluid collects in the follicles and around your organs. This can make you very bloated, very sore and uncomfortable and also hard to breathe. I had all these lovely symptoms, but again, not too bad compared to the first time. I am feeling much better now, thank God!

I will start my depot lupron (for my lining issue) with my next AF (Aunt Flo...period). This will be 2 shots, 30 days apart. So after the 60 days, I will go on bcp for 21 days overlapping the last 4 or 5 pills with lupron (more shots) to prepare for my FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer). This will most likely happen in July, I think.

Speaking of shots...I decided to do a little tally. To date, for this cycle only, mind you, I have had and/or given myself 52 shots (thigh, belly, hip), had 11 blood draws (and still counting), 1 IV (2 attempts and 2 shots to numb the area first) and approximately 90 acupuncture needles. That means I have been "stuck" about 157 times in the last month! yeouch!!! Of course, it will all be worth it in the end!

Phase One

2008-02-28T12:34:00.001-08:00

So, a few days ago, I started "phase one"...I started lupron injections. Actually I guess "phase one" probably started about a month ago w/bcp. Anyway, the only side effect I am noticing right now is hot flashes...not fun, but not the worst thing that could happen. I will have a "supression check" on Wednesday, March 5 to make sure "all is calm" inside. This is done by ultrasound and a blood draw. If all is good, I start stim injections Thursday. This will mean I will be doing 3 injections a day. Starting in the morning with Repronex, given intermuscularly (IM) in the hip (aka butt). Then, around 7pm, is the Lupron injection, given subcutaneously (sub-q) in the upper thigh, rounding it all out with a Gonal-f injection, also sub-q, in the belly. This will continue until my follicles are ready, or "ripe". Then I will have one more IM injection to release the follicles (ovulate). 36 hours later, I will go in for my egg retrieval, aka the best 20 minute nap around! Oh yeah, and I forgot, in the midst of all this, I will be traveling to Denver on the 10th! My mom is going with me Monday thru Friday. Ryan will arrive Saturday morning. While we are there, there will be lots of ultrasounds and blood draws, plus acupuncture and a meeting with a genetic counselor to discuss PGS (Preimplatation Genetic Screening) options. I know this time is going to fly by. Then we will be in "phase two" which will be Depot Lupron injections to hopefully correct my lining issue. During this time, genetic testing will be done on our embryos. After all that is done, it will be back to Denver for our FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer). What a whirlwind!!

Box 'o Drugs

2008-02-22T13:40:00.000-08:00

My big "Box 'o Drugs" came today. Actually it was supposed to be here by 10:30 am...it arrived at about 4:30 pm. I was under "house arrest" waiting for it since it requires a signature. That made my morning fun...you know the kind of day that you just know the minute you get in the shower, the delivery man will be at your door! So I had to do it all in stages...brush my teeth, wash my face...check for delivery truck...try to make hair look somewhat presentable for the day, aka, back comb a nice "poof" for a "stylish ponytail"...check for delivery truck...jump in shower for a quick scrub and rinse (no time for a shave today)...check for delivery truck. Of course this is all happening after I waited until after 10:30 when it should have been here (as it has been every other time). By now lunch time is approaching and my plans for the day keep getting pushed back. I called FedEx and she tried to tell me that all thier flights on the East coast were held up due to weather, but I am looking right at the tracking online that says it was on a truck for delivery at 6:30 this morning. After calling her on the lie, she said, "oh...that's right...what you are saying is correct...let me try to make a call and call you back." Of course, no call back. SOOOO anyhoo...they are here now...here is a picture of what my future holds in the next few weeks...ENJOY!!!

The parenthood marathon

2008-02-12T11:27:00.000-08:00

I was thinking today...often we (my bbc friends) say that infertilitly and IVF is such a roller coaster. I think it might actually be more like a marathon...not a race, but a marathon. You start out, often with others you may or may not know are in the same marathon, at the sound of the shotgun. You are all running along. For some runners, the marathon is beautiful, smooth and straight. For others, you may run into some hurdles. Some women stride over the hurdles gracefully, while others sometimes fall and skin thier knees. They get up and with luck they get over the hurdle and finish thier marathon. For some, they get over the hurdle to be faced with yet another one...and another one. Some people, and I include myself in this catagory, just can't seem to get over that first hurdle. Many of your friends have crossed over the finish line and are enjoying the fruits of thier labor. Most of them have not forgotten about you and that first hurdle. I imagine it pains them to not be able to help you over the hurdle. Some may even offer to jump that hurdle for you if you need them too and even a select few offer to run the whole marathon for you. You start to think, "maybe I should forget about this hurdle for a while." Maybe if you train more (diet and exercise) or seek out herbal remedies maybe you will be able to jump higher and clear the hurdle. You try everything in your power to get over that hurdle just to be knocked down by it over and over. You get so exhausted and tired of having scraped knees. Sometimes you think, "there must be another marathon for me. One that will allow me to cross the finish line."...even if that marathon takes you in a different direction. Sometimes you see some of the same familiar runners attempting this marathon for the second or third time...all while you are still trying to get over that one darn hurdle! Your friends and loved ones are often on the sidelines with all the positive energy in the world, cheering you on and offering support when you get knocked down. They all wish your marathon was without hurdles and you could just run right over the finish line.

Well, I am planning on making it over that darn hurdle and enjoying the fruits of my labor in early 2009. I understand that my new "trainer" is the best around! :D

Fasten your seat belt...here we go!!

2008-02-12T08:43:00.000-08:00

Well, I guess we aren't "going" quite yet, but I did book my reservations for Denver. I leave on March 10th and my mom is coming with me. Ryan will be in Washington D.C. for work and will meet up with me in Denver on the15th or 16th. My mom will leave to come back home on the 14th. I may have to figure out how to give myself an intermuscular (ouch!) shot!! I don't even want to go there right now! I will be in Denver until approximately March 21. We are going for our egg retrieval. I will be closely monitored with bloodwork and ultrasounds until they say I am "ripe" and ready for retrieval. I am excited to go, not only for the obvious reasons of gettin' this party started, but also my bff lives in Colorado Springs. My mom has never been to Colorado either. So, inspite of the twice daily injections and the "surgery" to get the eggs, I actually think this will be a fun "trip"!

Can I get some water?!?!

2008-02-11T10:25:00.000-08:00

I have been feeling a little "pity-party-ish" lately. It seems as though every time I turn around, someone else is pregnant. I have always handled this fairly well in the past...maybe I'm hormonal right now. Actually, I seem to use this excuse a lot lately! haha! It is just so frustrating...I almost hate to answer my phone sometimes because I feel like it is news that someone else is pregnant. Some people I know as acquaintances, some people a little more, and some people are very close to me. Don't get me wrong, I am happy for them. I would never ever wish infertility on anyone...well, maybe Britney Spears, but not even her, really! Another thing, I suppose I am glad people don't try to "protect" me and keep thier pregnancies (or those of others) from me. I am a strong woman...it may sting a bit sometimes, but I'd rather people are upfront with me than to find out down the road from someone else.

I had a doctor's appointment today. Just a yearly exam. The nurse who was checking me in and getting all my information was ticking me off!! Something came up about IVF and she asked if I have any children now. I said no and she just gave that smile...those of you who have ever dealt with infertility know the smile I speak of. Then there were two other times she brought it up when she was doing something on the computer and would say, "oh, no children" but didn't say anything else when filling in other information. I wanted to kick her in the head...

Which reminds me...I kind of miss Ally McBeal. Did anyone else watch this show?! Often I wish I had "Ally moments". You know when someone says or does something and you picture yourself ripping off thier heads and rolling them down a hallway or something as equally unbelievable...then you snap yourself back into the here and now. I find it very cathartic sometimes!

Anyway, enough of my babbling for today. I just wish that I could scream out sometimes when I hear news of someone else's impending bundles of joy, "WHEN IS IT MY TURN?!?!" Maybe I should just start going around to thier houses and drinking thier water!

We're Off To See The Wizard...

2008-02-07T13:20:00.000-08:00

The Wizard...that is one thing I have heard people call Dr. Schoolcraft. Instead of playing the part of the cowardly lion, tin man or scarecrow, we just went out in hopes of finding a way to make our family complete...so I guess you could call us the tin man since we were in search of our heart. We had our "one-day workup" of tests on Monday, October 29, 2007. This was a day full of tests on both of us. Blood tests, ultrasounds, ummm, Ryan's "test", my hysteroscopy and consultation after consultation (nurse, doctor, financial, etc). They even sent me home with requisitions to have more tests done. In Denver, everything was either as it should be or the diagnosis' we already knew about (PCOS and morphology). The last test I had to have done was an integrin (or uterine) biopsy. And yes, it was about as comfortable as it sounds. I have endured a lot over the course of the last 3 years...this test was by far the worst. I hope to never have to revisit that. It did, however, finally give us some answers. We found that my uterus lacks the beta-3 integrins required to make implantation of an embryo possible. The best part is that it can be treated. I will have to get injections (2 injections 30 days apart) of a drug called "depot-lupron". This drug will put my body into a "medically induced, reversable menopause". Sounds like fun, huh?! After I stop the drug, my lining will come back and should have the integrins. Hopefully, this is the answer to our prayers.

Some people have asked us when will we feel like enough is enough. I don't really know how to answer that. I guess it will be enough when we have our baby (or babies) to hold. What we do know is this...we will be parents, one way or another. Whatever we have to do to get there, we are gonna do it.

Jumpin' on the bandwagon

2008-02-07T10:06:00.000-08:00

So, I thought I'd try this blogging thing out...I mean everybody's doin' it, right?! Don't worry, mom, I won't jump off a bridge! haha!

A little about me. I am 34 and on a quest to be a mother. That is it in a nutshell. Our journey (that'd be me and my husband, Ryan) to become parents started out in January of 2005. Our thoughts at the time were if it happened right away, we would be ok, but if it took a while, you know, like 6 months or so, that would be ok too. Well, those six months came and went. The biggest problem was that I was not "regular"...I mean that I didn't have a visit from "Aunt Flo" during those 6 months. I went to my Ob/Gyn and they weren't too concerned. They said that with some people, it takes time to get the birth control pill out of thier system. After another 5 months, and still no visit from AF, I went back to the doctor. We decided that I should go on Clomid. This drug would make me ovulate. There was a small chance of twins being on this drug. Ryan and I were a little frightened about that at first, but decided to do it anyway (no pun intended). So, I took Clomid for 4 months. The worst side effects were the headaches and the night sweats. But I could handle it if it meant getting pregnant. After this didn't work, my Ob/Gyn suggested I seek the help of a Reproductive Endocrinologist, or RE for short. We went to a seminar of a local RE that we had heard good things about. We "signed on" right away. This was March of 2006.

After our initial consultation with this doctor, we discovered our best bet of having a baby would be In-Vitro Fertilization, or IVF. We were shocked! Never in my dreams of becoming a mother did I ever see them starting thier lives in a test tube! I was diagnosed with having PCOS and Ryan had low morphology, meaning if I did ovulate, his "swimmers" could get there fast (and lots of them) but only a small percentage of them would "know what to do" once they got there. So, after our pity party, we got going.

Our first IVF started in June of 2006. It consisted of about 15 days of twice daily shots sub-cutaniously (sub-q) or in the belly or upper thigh. Did I mention my paralyzing fear of needles yet?! But again, what ever it took to have a baby, I'd find a way to do it. I also decided to up my chances and do acupuncture (gasp!). With this cycle, I got 13 eggs, 12 fertilized. After my egg retrieval, I developed Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome, or OHSS. I looked as though I was 5 months pregnant because of all the fluid in my abdomen. The pain was excrutiating. I told Ryan, "this better work, because I can't do this again." After a couple "emergency" trips to the doctors and lots of vicodin, we came upon our transfer day. We transferred two 5 day blastocysts. I was feeling a little better at this time so we decided to go ahead with the transfer rather than freeze everything and transfer at a later date. Unfortunately, I did not get pregnant. We were devastated and confused. How could it have not worked?! They put 2 embryos directly into my uterus!!

In October 2006, we decided to give our 5 frozen embryos a chance. When it came time for this transfer, we were told that 4 survived "the thaw" but they did not look good at all. We transferred all 4, but the end result was the same, bfn (big fat negative).

Then we hesitantly went into another fresh cycle in December of 2006. I was scared to death about OHSS again. I was monitored very closely and was lucky to not hyperstim again. With this cycle, we got 12 eggs, 11 fertilized. Again, we transferred two 4 day morulas that were "beautiful". Our hearts broke once again when it was another bfn and we had nothing "left over" to freeze. After this, I was focused on getting my body healthy again since all the hormones and shots take a major toll on your body, not to mention mind. I started seeing an herbalist. I took tons of herbs, changed my diet and felt great! So.....

We decided to go for it again in May of 2007. I once again did acupuncture. I, surprisingly enough, LOVE acupuncture now! This cycle went beautifully. They got 28 eggs out of me this time! We transferred two 5 day blasts graded 5AA, "textbook quality". We felt so good about this cycle, so much was different already! However, once again, we were blown away with yet another bfn. I seriously thought the nurse was joking when she called with the results.

After all the heartache, Ryan and I decided it was time to go in a different direction. Our doctor wouldn't run additional tests. His answer for us was to use a surrogate. We were not ready for that since we didn't have any answers to all of our "whys". So, we made an aggressive decision...we were going to Denver to see the #1 fertility specialist in the world...Dr. William Schoolcraft.